Life Happens
I felt the need to get down on paper...ok, computer...some of my feelings about this past year. 2016 was not kind to my family. There. I said it. Now, on to explain.
We start each year with a clean slate. 365 clean slates to be exact. But on January 1st of each year, we look ahead thinking "This is going to be the best year ever". We make big plans.
**Case in point:
December 31st, 2015.
My dining room.
Both of my boys, all of my grandchildren, my cousin Crystal, plus Troy and myself.
I announce that I have a 60 before 60 list that I will be working on in 2016, explaining to the grandkids that I will be turning 60 in 2017. We talk about the list, how I might be able to accomplish it, etc. My cousin/bestie and I start planning our trip to NY City. I had never been. It sounds wonderful to all, and everyone was excited for me.
Then Life Happened......
Let me preface this with a disclaimer. This blog post is not about feeling sorry for myself or my family. We are truly blessed. Actually blessed beyond belief! This whole post is just about how things happen that get in the way of OUR plans. And how maybe we should remember that there is a higher being that may have different plans than ours. So on to my story....
I started 2016 doing everything I could to get some of those items off my 60 before 60 list. And I did get some of them marked off! Then in May I became ill, had bloodwork done, and found out that I had a recurrence of the CMV that had hospitalized me in 2014. For those of you who aren't familiar with CMV, it is in the same "family" with mono, so I was very tired and had no real desire to do much of anything. And for those of you who know me well, you know this isn't me at all! I was miserable!
Then the hammer came down hard on life. My son Ryan had a terrible work accident, having his leg broken and his ankle crushed by stone slabs. Due to massive swelling, surgery was delayed, and once he did have surgery, he had the external metal frame screwed into his bones to hold everything together. I realize these are non medical terms, but all I know is that this was a terrible, painful, horrible situation. I spent a lot of weekends in VA helping him and the kids. He also became separated from his wife during this time, making everything a little bit worse all the way around. I won't go into details, but suffice it to say, life was not pleasant for my son most days. He could barely move, was by himself a lot while not being able to move much, get his food, etc. He missed his kids when they weren't with him, and it was just plain awful on everyone. And as a Mom, it was awful for me, too. All I wanted was to be there for him. And being three hours away was excruciating!
We continued to plan a vacation to Lake Anna as we always do. We had an ok week there. No one needs to hear any of my moaning and groaning about things that didn't go right. The Punkins all had a great time and that's what really mattered. Ryan was in a wheel chair, so it was very difficult for him to make it to the dock from the house, so he spent a lot of time by himself while we were at the dock and in the water. But our family was together for the week. We needed that!
I did mark some items off that 60 before 60 list. Not all, but some! My cousin and I did make it to The Big Apple for a two day trip that was better than my wildest dreams! We had an incredibly good time! I put away my worries for 2 whole days and had a blast!
So here we are well into 2017. 2016 is behind us. Yes, Life Happened. But we are all a little stronger and a little wiser in spite of...or maybe because of...it! We are fast approaching the one year anniversary of Ryan's accident. He is, and will always be, on a cane to walk. His foot and ankle will never be "right" again. He has ankle replacements to look forward to in the future. He will never work as a chef again (his college degree is Culinary Arts), he will never work a job where he needs to walk a lot, lift, etc. His whole world has changed...the way he does dishes and laundry, the way he buys groceries. Basically, anything he needs two arms for, he can't do because one hand is always on his cane. He is still in pain a lot, especially after walking or being on his leg for a while. BUT, he has his kiddos, and he has his Faith. He definitely has shown me up in the Faith department this past year. There were times I know my faith was almost nonexistent, but he always would say to me, "I'm looking up Mom. That's the only way I will get through this."
God sure has a way of letting us know that He is in control. We may question the routes He takes us on, but ultimately He knows what is best for us. Did I ever want one of my Sons to become disabled? Of course not! Have I hated every minute of his pain and suffering? Yes! Every. Single. Second! But I'm pretty sure Ryan can make it through anything that life has to throw at him now. His kiddos are his life, and his love for them is amazing! His Faith is still unwavering. He WILL be ok. And so will I! And my 60 before 60 list? It's now a 65 before 65 list. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade...Boom! Take that lemons!
Life Happens... And the Maker of our Life will see us through it!
We start each year with a clean slate. 365 clean slates to be exact. But on January 1st of each year, we look ahead thinking "This is going to be the best year ever". We make big plans.
**Case in point:
December 31st, 2015.
My dining room.
Both of my boys, all of my grandchildren, my cousin Crystal, plus Troy and myself.
I announce that I have a 60 before 60 list that I will be working on in 2016, explaining to the grandkids that I will be turning 60 in 2017. We talk about the list, how I might be able to accomplish it, etc. My cousin/bestie and I start planning our trip to NY City. I had never been. It sounds wonderful to all, and everyone was excited for me.
Then Life Happened......
Let me preface this with a disclaimer. This blog post is not about feeling sorry for myself or my family. We are truly blessed. Actually blessed beyond belief! This whole post is just about how things happen that get in the way of OUR plans. And how maybe we should remember that there is a higher being that may have different plans than ours. So on to my story....
I started 2016 doing everything I could to get some of those items off my 60 before 60 list. And I did get some of them marked off! Then in May I became ill, had bloodwork done, and found out that I had a recurrence of the CMV that had hospitalized me in 2014. For those of you who aren't familiar with CMV, it is in the same "family" with mono, so I was very tired and had no real desire to do much of anything. And for those of you who know me well, you know this isn't me at all! I was miserable!
Then the hammer came down hard on life. My son Ryan had a terrible work accident, having his leg broken and his ankle crushed by stone slabs. Due to massive swelling, surgery was delayed, and once he did have surgery, he had the external metal frame screwed into his bones to hold everything together. I realize these are non medical terms, but all I know is that this was a terrible, painful, horrible situation. I spent a lot of weekends in VA helping him and the kids. He also became separated from his wife during this time, making everything a little bit worse all the way around. I won't go into details, but suffice it to say, life was not pleasant for my son most days. He could barely move, was by himself a lot while not being able to move much, get his food, etc. He missed his kids when they weren't with him, and it was just plain awful on everyone. And as a Mom, it was awful for me, too. All I wanted was to be there for him. And being three hours away was excruciating!
We continued to plan a vacation to Lake Anna as we always do. We had an ok week there. No one needs to hear any of my moaning and groaning about things that didn't go right. The Punkins all had a great time and that's what really mattered. Ryan was in a wheel chair, so it was very difficult for him to make it to the dock from the house, so he spent a lot of time by himself while we were at the dock and in the water. But our family was together for the week. We needed that!
I did mark some items off that 60 before 60 list. Not all, but some! My cousin and I did make it to The Big Apple for a two day trip that was better than my wildest dreams! We had an incredibly good time! I put away my worries for 2 whole days and had a blast!
So here we are well into 2017. 2016 is behind us. Yes, Life Happened. But we are all a little stronger and a little wiser in spite of...or maybe because of...it! We are fast approaching the one year anniversary of Ryan's accident. He is, and will always be, on a cane to walk. His foot and ankle will never be "right" again. He has ankle replacements to look forward to in the future. He will never work as a chef again (his college degree is Culinary Arts), he will never work a job where he needs to walk a lot, lift, etc. His whole world has changed...the way he does dishes and laundry, the way he buys groceries. Basically, anything he needs two arms for, he can't do because one hand is always on his cane. He is still in pain a lot, especially after walking or being on his leg for a while. BUT, he has his kiddos, and he has his Faith. He definitely has shown me up in the Faith department this past year. There were times I know my faith was almost nonexistent, but he always would say to me, "I'm looking up Mom. That's the only way I will get through this."
God sure has a way of letting us know that He is in control. We may question the routes He takes us on, but ultimately He knows what is best for us. Did I ever want one of my Sons to become disabled? Of course not! Have I hated every minute of his pain and suffering? Yes! Every. Single. Second! But I'm pretty sure Ryan can make it through anything that life has to throw at him now. His kiddos are his life, and his love for them is amazing! His Faith is still unwavering. He WILL be ok. And so will I! And my 60 before 60 list? It's now a 65 before 65 list. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade...Boom! Take that lemons!
Life Happens... And the Maker of our Life will see us through it!
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