Finding Peace During Quarantine

I have noticed a gradual change in my attitude toward staying at home in the past week.  Could it be that I'm starting to like it?  Whaaaatttt???

I was actually thinking about this very thing Tuesday morning, while sitting in my favorite chair, still in my PJs, drinking my coffee and finishing my yogurt and strawberries.  Did I mention it was 8:30 AM?  Yeah, I was just hanging out watching the Today show, nice and warm covered in my blanket.
I was thinking about what my "old normal" 8:30AM looked like.  Patients would be arriving, I would be preparing contracts for the day, my coffee would be long cold or gone, and my breakfast would seem long done. I would have been up for 3.5 hours if that was a MD day, or 4.5 and had my gym workout in for the day if it was the PA office.  By this time of the morning, I would also feel the stress creeping in. But here I was, still lounging, still relaxed, having been up for about an hour and a half.  I started thinking about how much I was enjoying my quiet mornings on the days I'm not working.  That's 2 or 3 days a week depending on the week, so those days I really do enjoy my mornings. 

Why the change in attitude?  Hmmmm....I kept trying to put my finger on it.  What was it?
So I started listing things that changed that I was enjoying~~

• Sleeping in a bit on days I'm not working.  No 4AM alarm in about a month now.
• Morning relaxation.  No rushing to get out the door.  No driving to the gym at 4:30AM.
• More time with Troy.  Ok...Mind Blown here!  But yes, I look forward to him coming home at the end of his work day.  I meet him at the door and chatter away, showing him my accomplishments for the day. I'm not sure he is enjoying this as much as me, but....
• Leisurely cooking and baking time.  No 3 hour meal prep sessions on Sundays.  They have been replaced with morning baking and nightly preparation of the evening meal.
• I'm enjoying my home.  That sounds pretty simple, but when you feel like you're never home, this is huge!  I'm enjoying this place Troy and I have made into a home for many years.  And with the cleaning and organizing I'm doing, I'm enjoying the results so much!
• I have time to devote to things I enjoy...writing my blog posts, reading to my Punkins and other boys and girls out there whose Moms need a break, and catching up on projects.
• I am seeing (but not spending time with 😞) my parents more.  I am enjoying doing their grocery shopping and dropping it off at their house.  And my sister and I take dinner to them on Friday nights.  Yes, these are drop and runs so that we don't contaminate them, while wearing masks and gloves, and not hugging them.  But I see them.  I know they are ok.   I am calling them more often because I have time.  
• I am walking (while practicing social distancing) with my daughter-in-law Angie every weekend.  We walk 6 miles and talk and relax.  I never would normally have time for this because my weekends are reserved for cleaning, laundry and meal prep.  
• No stress eating.  Not one bite of eating has been stress related.  As a matter of fact, some days I completely forget to eat lunch until I look at the clock and see it is 2PM.  

So I guess this all started me thinking about the peace I am starting to feel.  Yes.  I said I'm starting to feel peace.  What is going on here?  Well, I think I am starting to narrow it down.  Stay with me for a minute.   Because I am still feeling some stress in my life.  Like when will I ever get my unemployment pay?  But that is probably one of the few stressors I have.  Of course I worry about my Sons being in harms way of this virus.  And I worry about my parents and Troy's Mom as they are up in age and have some health issues.  But mostly, I feel peace, contentment, and relaxed.  

I found the picture that is at the end of this post on Pinterest.  I read it and then I read it again.  Here it was!  The answer to my why.  If this pandemic had not happened, I would never have been willing to let go of things that cause me stress, or as this picture says, "the people, places, and things that create all the noise in your life".  Could it be that losing connection with everything that was "normal" and "necessary" in my life was the answer to finding my peace?  Yes.  I think this is it 100%!  My job is super stressful, there are people in my life that cause me stress, and there are just "things" and places that can't be avoided when we are not in a lockdown situation.  THIS is the answer.  I wasn't willing to do this on my own.  And yes, I still miss people and places and my routines of past, but I am starting to enjoy the new normal.  I am starting to enjoy being back to basics, back to my family, back to my relationship with my husband.  So I am going to start to slow things down here.  I have been frantically working on my house.  I'm pretty much out of rooms to work on, and I think that's ok.  I think it's time to sit on my porch, if the weather ever cooperates, and read a book.  Or go through old pictures, which is one area I haven't gone to yet.  Or maybe do nothing one day.  I don't know.  I might not have much longer at home, so just in case, I want to savor a few days of quiet nothingness.  I won't lie. I'm kind of glad I've had this opportunity.  The chance to find peace and know it is possible.  To know that I can survive without certain people, places and things in my life.  It's all gonna be alright.  Bob Marley told us so:

Singing' don't worry 'bout a thing
'Cause every little thing gonna be alright
Singing' don't worry (don't worry) 'bout a thing
'Cause every little thing gonna be alright